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Kelly: I believe we handled the evolution of our relationship very consciously.

I’d ask him for career advice, he’d ask me for relationship advice. I respect friendship more than a fleeting escapade.

At each new point, we always had a conversation to find out where we were and how we felt.

I think that viewing relationships as an inevitable thing that happens between two people who are attracted to each other takes away from the emotional vulnerability, and work, that goes into building strong commitments.

Ashley: We hooked up for a semester in college, then spent about two years being mostly just friends again while he did an internship in NY (I was still based in Indiana) then moved to Seattle.

After a year in Seattle he came back to Indiana to visit, and we decided to try and date for real. Ashley: We talked so much about every decision and all of our feelings so that even when it felt weird, it quickly went back to not feeling weird.

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Kelly: We were good ol’ fashion friends from the fall of 2010 to the fall of 2011. Then we were friends with benefits until I moved to Seattle, and then back to just friends until October of 2013.

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