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I know this sounds smug, but it's truly one of the only things I'm good at. And trust me, I'm not a bitch who saunters around the dyke bar yelling at faux lesbians, "You're not a REAL lesbian! I flunked gym class, and I wear a giant quilted Chanel purse in lieu of house keys. I used to say lezdar was a talent that can't be taught. But if you can't stomach going down on her, you're not a lesbian.
You can't teach someone to be a good singer, and you can't teach a person to have good lezdar. So I realized I can teach the rest of you regular people a few warning signs that she's not a lesbian: Look, the first sign she's not a lesbian is if she doesn't like to venture downtown. Oral sex with a woman is so intensely intimate, you can't fake liking that sort of thing.
My inbox is always filled with frantic messages from lesbians of all ages, constantly asking something along the lines of "I like this girl, but how can I tell if she's a lesbian?! I still screw up "than" and "then" (much to the dismay of my editor). Being able to tell if a woman is not a l-e-s-b-i-a-n.
But the real question is, how can you tell if she's NOT a lesbian? I'm overwhelmed by menial tasks, like responding to text messages and listening to voicemails.
But when she told me her girlfriend never liked to have sex with her, I knew I wasn't wrong, baby.
The girl just wanted to reap the lesbian chivalry perks, without having to have sex with her. She wanted to have slumber parties with a cool girl who also paid for her dinners.
The lesbian proceeds to destroy the best years of her dating life holding out for someone who isn't even gay. Being a lez is so much more than just hooking up and drunkenly rolling around in bed with another girl creature.
Flirting with someone you're attracted to will make the coolest girl a shrinking violet.Sometimes, we're on really high doses of antidepressants and have traded in our libidos for that extra kick of serotonin.However, if I meet a lesbian, and she's never been interested in sex with her female partner, it's usually a little suspect.You just like the occasional romp with a lady, which is totally fine!Just be sure to say that to the lesbian you're romping with.